Archaeorainbology - The Rainbows Theory of Prehistoric Monument Location

So I was standing in the north field of Lochbrow last week, daydreaming when I should have been augering, and wondering why the weather always had to be wet and windy, and I realized that every time the sun came out in the afternoon, a rainbow appeared over the termination of the timber cursus.

An afternoon rainbow at Lochbrow.

So I immediately decided that that was why the cursus had been constructed. The Neolithic people of Dumfries and Galloway loved rainbows, so they built a monument in its honour. See, the cursus even curves like a rainbow*:

A Lochbow is like a rainbow but more Scottish.

What's more, it was the equinox, so that was further confirmation. My archaeoastronomical speculations were pretty much bulletproof. After speaking to some archaeologists in the pub last night, they agreed** with me. It is clear that all prehistoric sites in the world were built to honour curving beams of drizzle-refracted light.

So just in case anyone overheard our conversation and thinks about trying to claim archaeorainbology as their own - hands off! This may be 'uncontrolled speculation bordering on lunacy' but it is my uncontrolled speculation bordering on lunacy. You go and think up your own.


If only the cursus-builders had used some rolling stones,
then we'd have had a permanent monument to rainbows.



*It also looks a bit phallic, but that's another theory entirely and not one I shall sully this highly reputable blog with.

**I didn't give them much opportunity to reply, so this may not be true.


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