On a quiet train from Doncaster to York, three girls are sitting at a table a short way up the carriage from me. Across the aisle, their mothers (one southern, one northern) sit at a separate table. They are most likely a family group, off to York for a holiday. The girls, probably cousins, I decide, are consulting a Heat-style magazine, with the two older girls - probably about 11 or 12 - analysing the images before them, presumably of female celebrities. Girl 1 seems to be the more forceful personality, with Girl 2 a bit more acquiescent. Ostensibly I'm reading the paper, but find myself unable to resist transcribing some of what I overhear.
GIRL 1: "I don't like what she's done with matching those clothes."
GIRL 2: "Yes. Too matchy."
GIRL 1: "No, they don't match at all."
[A moment later.]
GIRL 2: "I love that outfit!"
GIRL 1: "Yes, I hate the colour. It just doesn't suit her."
Just as I wonder whether the modern media is encouraging judgmentalism in a new generation, or whether it is simply a new form of an old hobby - talking about other people - the girls reveal a self-awareness that, unkindly, I hadn't credited them with.
GIRL 1 [with bemusement]: "On this page they tell you to lose weight and then on the next page there's a recipe for delicious chocolate cookies. Do they want us to lose weight or put it on?"
GIRL 2: "They want us to stay the same."
GIRL 1 [laughing, and putting on an advertizing jingle voice]: "Lose two pounds! Then put it straight back on!"
[They giggle among themselves for a while, and then one of the mothers realizes that the girls have eaten the entire box of chocolate brownies she'd given them, and they are told off. After a period of awkward silence, they return to the magazine.]
GIRL 2: "Ooh, puzzles. I love puzzles!"
[They begin the crossword.]
GIRL 1: "What would 'seats of learning' be, Mum?"
MOTHER: "Desk."
GIRL 1: "It's seven letters."
MOTHER: "Desktop."
[There is a pause whilst the two girls consider this.]
GIRL 2: "No, wouldn't it be 'schools'?"
Satisfied that all is well with the world, and that every generation is both the same as the previous one, and utterly different, I return to reading the paper.
GIRL 1: "I don't like what she's done with matching those clothes."
GIRL 2: "Yes. Too matchy."
GIRL 1: "No, they don't match at all."
[A moment later.]
GIRL 2: "I love that outfit!"
GIRL 1: "Yes, I hate the colour. It just doesn't suit her."
Just as I wonder whether the modern media is encouraging judgmentalism in a new generation, or whether it is simply a new form of an old hobby - talking about other people - the girls reveal a self-awareness that, unkindly, I hadn't credited them with.
GIRL 1 [with bemusement]: "On this page they tell you to lose weight and then on the next page there's a recipe for delicious chocolate cookies. Do they want us to lose weight or put it on?"
GIRL 2: "They want us to stay the same."
GIRL 1 [laughing, and putting on an advertizing jingle voice]: "Lose two pounds! Then put it straight back on!"
[They giggle among themselves for a while, and then one of the mothers realizes that the girls have eaten the entire box of chocolate brownies she'd given them, and they are told off. After a period of awkward silence, they return to the magazine.]
GIRL 2: "Ooh, puzzles. I love puzzles!"
[They begin the crossword.]
GIRL 1: "What would 'seats of learning' be, Mum?"
MOTHER: "Desk."
GIRL 1: "It's seven letters."
MOTHER: "Desktop."
[There is a pause whilst the two girls consider this.]
GIRL 2: "No, wouldn't it be 'schools'?"
Satisfied that all is well with the world, and that every generation is both the same as the previous one, and utterly different, I return to reading the paper.
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