The Lizard King of the Dead Ball

Some years ago, Leicester's best-loved footballer-turned-sports presenter* claimed that the leaders of the western world were shape-shifting lizards. Despite many interesting arguments, his hypothesis was not widely accepted.

However, I suggest we now re-examine Mr Icke's work with a careful eye. His only error may have been to assume that the Queen, George Bush and Kris Kristofferson were the leaders of the western world. Everyone knows the most important people in modern civilization are footballers, and they are certainly becoming increasingly reptilian:

The strange crest, the scaly blue-green limbs, the discordant, high-pitched voice. Pretty compelling, I'd say.

*David Icke, you numpty. Gary Lineker has a long way to go yet.