Walking home a few nights ago, I passed one of the Aberdeen Sightseeing buses (or rather, it passed me). Ignoring the obvious mystery of how many sights there are to see, I noticed that the bus proclaimed that tickets were hop-on, hop-off and valid for 24 hours. Would this mean, I wondered, that you could hop on at 2am for a nocturnal tour? It might be fun to do so:
"On your right, as we turn past Archibald Simpson's into Union Street, you will see three sloshed old gents in ill-fitting wigs singing 'Flower of Scotland' as they stumble along the road."
"To your left now, two teenage girls are comforting a friend as she projectile vomits into a city council refuse cart."
"Coming up shortly, as we pass the birdshit-spattered statue of King Edward VII, five men are failing miserably to injure each other in a fight, the origins of which can be traced back to an argument about the disloyalty of Kenny Miller three hours earlier."
What a magical mystery tour it would be.
"On your right, as we turn past Archibald Simpson's into Union Street, you will see three sloshed old gents in ill-fitting wigs singing 'Flower of Scotland' as they stumble along the road."
"To your left now, two teenage girls are comforting a friend as she projectile vomits into a city council refuse cart."
"Coming up shortly, as we pass the birdshit-spattered statue of King Edward VII, five men are failing miserably to injure each other in a fight, the origins of which can be traced back to an argument about the disloyalty of Kenny Miller three hours earlier."
What a magical mystery tour it would be.
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